shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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