After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
