This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
