There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
