If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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