Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
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