physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
did you just send me my own nude
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
