okay pat passed out under dana's car
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Randomize
