Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
But I just had this pork p�t�. It was dick grabbing.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking ros�, bitch!
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
