Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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