You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
