what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
We got so high we made milksteak
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
