IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Rumble strips road head = magical
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize
