i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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