Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
