would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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