I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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