Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
