he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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