I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Randomize
