At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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