Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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