I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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