you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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