At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
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