Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
