I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
