yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
