I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
True strength comes from lack of pants
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Randomize
