Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Randomize
