Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
