I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
