If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
