I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
When are your genitals available?
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
