With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
