so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
