Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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