Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
True strength comes from lack of pants
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
