I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Randomize
