he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
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