I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
