we made out on top of his cat.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
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