I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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