I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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