I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
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