on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
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