I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Randomize
