In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
