it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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