I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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